tacenda

那天在甜品店里，背景突然响起那首歌。 我的耳朵一竖，不假思索地说了一句：“那段时间，我一直在听这首歌。几乎天天都听。” 说完，才立刻察觉他也坐在一起吃甜品。 我往他的方向看了一下。他一直看着甜品，一直吃着，什么反应都没有。 又或者他不想给任何反应。 那段时间，我就是一直听着这首歌，提醒自己，好啦要放手了。 没想到很久以后的今天，这首歌响起，我还是觉得自己一直没能放开。 最後的疼愛　是 手放開 不想用言語拉扯所以選擇不責怪 感情就像候車月台　有人走　有人來 我的心是一個站牌 寫著 等待 我把收音機打開　聽著別人的失敗 哽咽的聲音彷彿訴說著相同悲哀 你的依賴　還在胸懷 我無法輕易推開　我無法隨便走開 感情中專心的人容易被傷害

I managed a 3 km today. Not the best record but I guess I will have to try harder the next time. I suspect I might be more motivated if best friend had been beside me like usual. I got myself a cup of my favourite signature iced chocolate with soy milk from Starbucks and sat there to have my drink while watching people get their drinks. It was a rare Sunday where I got to spend some time alone doing nothing but people-watch and let my thoughts settle. I really need to stop putting my foot into what will have no outcome... Man, GL, STOP IT!

今天的我，只想好好哭一场。

我并没放弃追求梦想。 它时而离我很近，时而却遥不可及。 这一次它感觉在我身边，但也许也是离我个十万八千里。 我真的害怕自己的心不能够再承受我不愿听到的消息。 我知道我最应该做的是放下。 但就是，好难。 现在的我，很多东西都愿意舍弃。 你说爱情嘛，它与我插肩而过无数次。 友情呢，有的我真的不愿意再纠缠。 亲情，我自问是尽力而为。 梦想这一块，我一直还是牢牢抓住。 可不可以给我一次尝试的机会? 拜托?

So during the 7 Habits course last month, the trainer asked that we write down a goal that we would like to set out for the year. I actually wrote that I wanted to start running. Gosh, I simply just hate running. One thing, it hurts my knees so bad. Another is that my stamina is really lousy. Nevertheless, I think it should be a great sport overall but I have never really dragged myself to run, whether is it outside or on the treadmill. Time and again, I gave myself dozens of excuses to procrastinate this simple task.  Today, I finally decided to just give it a try, with my best friend beside me on the treadmill, since he always runs when he goes to the gym with me. I thought I was probably going to die after 1 km after not running for years, so I told myself I would just do my best. I actually managed a 2.6 km eventually and even though that was not a very long distance covered, I was proud of myself for having accomplished something for a start.  I like this feeling of accom...

今天下雨了。我好像没能好好欣赏这场雨，它就停了。 又或者，因为我的心是阴天，所以一整天没心情去观察周围的人事物。 昨天是晴天。 但我的心好像更多时候是阴天。 昨天，我和儿时的梦想靠得非常近。但在那个瞬间之后，我却觉得我们之间的距离从未那么遥远过。 但我的脑子里，又一直偷偷抱有一线希望。 这样算反复吗? 我的心情确实就是如此。

My boss picked me to attend the 2-day 7 Habits of Highly Effective People course. In all honesty, I was quite reluctant to be there initially. At the back of my head, there was a voice that repeatedly nagged, "Go and learn new things and make new friends." I struggled the day before, went anyway because I had to. The 2 full-day course was a very thought-provoking one. I learnt a lot more about myself and strategies to overcome certain issues that have persisted for months or years. Of course, whether or not I adopt these strategies is a totally different story altogether. I think I was unusually introverted than I usually am during the course. That was kind of another struggle. But I made a friend, Sandy. She has a pleasant disposition and I appreciate that. At the end of the course, the trainer Michael Lee went around giving the participants their certificates and shaking their hands. When it was my turn, he thanked me for being very attentive in class. I was not sure if I h...